Ark Valley News - Out of the office

Out of the office
By Chris Strunk
Last Updated: June 01, 2017

Loaded burger comes up empty

I'm not a great cook, so I rarely try anything new.

My wife is the experimenter when it comes to recipes. She'll try making just about anything, if it sounds good.

Don't tell her I said this, but not everything she makes is a home run, but it's always worth checking off the list.

Son Jeremiah is kind of like that. He likes to make stuff in the kitchen, too. He texted me the other day and asked if he could make an apple pie.

After scratching my head, I said sure, as long as you don't use anything Mom needs for meals this week. Lisa keeps a weekly list of dinners she plans to make. It's a good idea because often the kids will be tempted to eat whatever they see in the pantry.

Check the list, Mom always says, before you make anything.

Well, the apple pie ingredients were nowhere on the list. So, Jeremiah made one that I heard was pretty good.

I don't eat a lot of sweets, so I didn't have any. If he would've made a pot roast or something like that, I would've been able to judge his efforts.

Last week, I saw one of those 30-second videos on Facebook that show how easy it is to make yummy meals and I thought, yes, I can do this one.

You may have seen it: Cheese-stuffed hamburgers. I know, it's not like putting together a recipe. It's more like layering stuff together. But that's about my speed in the kitchen.

You shape hamburger patties around the bottom of a beer can, then put some cheese inside and cover it with another hamburger patty.

Then you wrap the edges with bacon.

The video called for bacon-wrapped onions, too, but I didn't want to work that hard on Memorial Day weekend.

I made eight of those burgers for dinner on May 27. They were ridiculously large, and they looked great going onto the grill. Take a picture, I told one of the kids.

Unfortunately, most of the cheese melted out while on the grill.

The family said the burgers were good, but I could've saved the effort and just put the cheese on top.

You see, that's why I don't experiment with food very much.

†††

Our Memorial Day weekend was uneventful, but relaxing.

We stayed home, played backyard games and ate way too much food.

On Memorial Day, we went to St. Mark Cemetery, where my mom, dad, sister, grandparents and many relatives are buried.

I have decided I want to be buried there when I die, even though I'm not a Catholic. I wonder if they'll sell me a plot. I don't know the rules about such things and really haven't given it much thought.

It's such a nice cemetery.

After lunch, we went to downtown Wichita and walked around. I later told my wife that I was going to get the old jet ski started so we could take it out for a few hours, and then I lost motivation. For one, I didn't want to deal with the crowds at the lake, and, secondly, I didn't want to hassle with the cantankerous ski. It's a lot of fun when it's running good.

We went home and played cornhole and badminton instead.

I know I already passed this milestone, but it's frustrating, nonetheless, when I'm reminded that my teenage kids can beat me at most games that require a level of activity or athleticism.

Even cornhole? Come on. The students have become the master.

Chris Strunk is publisher of The Ark Valley News. Reach him at 755-0821 or news@arkvalleynews.com, or find him on Facebook.